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Valleyboyabroad: Scribbles from the Edge
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The King of Swaziland
The king of Swaziland has ordered an end to a five year no-sex rite for teenage girls to try and reduce the spread of Aids in his tiny African kingdom. Under the umchwasho chastity pledge any breach was punishable by a fine of one cow for anyone that violated a maiden. The king himself was fined one cow when he breached the pledge by taking a teenage maiden for his ninth wife. The pledge has been lifted ahead of the annual reed dance where the king can choose a wife from the countries bare breasted maidens as they perform before him. The hopeful maidens dream of having a mobile phone and other luxuries should the king select them for his bed. Parents of teenage boys are glad that the pledge has been lifted, complaining that the fine was too steep. One farmer complained bitterly that the antics of his young son had cost him an entire herd. A business student at Dartmouth university is marketing a new product called Hu-Fu aimed at vegetarian cannibals. It is basically tofu that tastes like human flesh. The student declined to comment on how Hu-Fu was product tested and said that his recent trips to Papua New Guinea were entirely coincidental. A man in Australia appeared in court last month on charges of animal cruelty and bestiality after the RSPC discovered 17 dead rabbits and one guinea pig. The 18 charges included 17 of animal cruelty and one of bestiality. The man claimed that he rabbits were for a bloody good stew and that the guinea pig was a bloody good shag and was gagging for it. yechydda, |
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