Well I didn't get up this 'morning', in fact it was two in the afternoon, following Wales narrow victory over England in Rugby Union. It was the first time that Wales had beaten England since they defeated them at Wembley, England in 1999, and the first time that they had beaten the 'old enemy' at Cardiff, Wales' capital in twelve long and bitter years. It was televised here in Saigon at one o'clock in the morning and I watched it alone in fear and trepidation in a darkened room. There was nobody to celebrate with afterwards, and so I am going out today to get suitably mashed in honour of Wales magnificent achievement, which is no less than they deserve. And so I hand you over to Roy Rubberplunger, ace Welsh reporter with the Welsh Leek with one from the archives.

This report filed by our man on the spot, Roy Rubberplunger.

This week a global summit of Philosophers met in Bagdad, Tasmania, to discuss the future of their discipline. It is reported that there were many heated exchanges especially at the fringe meetings where the hot topic of debate was apparently whether Catherine Zeta Jones was a

'Smoky big-breasted bitch that was gagging for it'.

Or not.

Professor Paradigm Shift was heard to express his disillusionment at the banality of modern philosophy, citing the plethora or reality philosophy shows such as,

'I'm a Philospher! Get me out of this existential despair!'

Elsewhere, Kuhn was heard to call Kant a Kunt and police were called in to break up a riot after a radical group of atheists managed to successfully prove that God did not, in fact, exist. The Radical Atheist Philosophers, known as Rappers, later complained that the Christian Orthodox Philosophers, knows as Cops, had not observed appropriate philisophical protocol by bussing in several Arch-Angels as ringers, and that it was this group of celestial beings that had mightily smote the atheists first shuting

'Do you believe in God now?'

At the end of the summit I questioned the head Philosopher as to whether there was any future for the philisophical movement. He replied,

'May'be, may'be not.'

Ace reporter Roy Rubberplunger signing off.

Perhaps.

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